02 May 2014

learning new balance.

I feel like I might be writing this post for the rest of my life.  Living life involves finding balance - constantly.  It seems that with every new season, we have to evolve our balancing act yet again.  Let me walk you through a glimpse of where I'm coming from.

When I was single : I really gave everything extra to becoming my healthiest.  If I had to cut out a certain food, buy vitamins, go on a cleanse, exercise more, etc...I could go to the extreme and just make the decision and run with it.  No questions about it.  What I ate or did before bed didn't effect anyone but me, so I could be rigorous.  My other extreme - I was a yes person.  There weren't many things (if there were!) that I didn't try to make work.  Coffee dates, commitments, rides, new friends, parties, travel - I was there.

Then I got married: Those "me" decisions quickly became "we" decisions and I had to learn how to just say no.  A new found balance and freedom that I had never experienced consistently to this point in life.  My biggest everyday adjustment at that point was cleaning our apartment.  I wasn't used to living with someone where I carried most of the responsibility to keep the place clean.  I had to adapt my systems to work with his, allot more time to actually get stuff done, and had to learn to relax a bit over how spotless I was expecting our house to be!

Skip ahead to now: This Sarah, as a wife to a patient and gracious man and a mama of two beautiful boys.  I find that some days, I have to force myself to say "yes", ha!  Not entirely a "no" person but still trying to find the balance for what is too much and just enough - when it comes to other people filling my time.  I'm also quickly finding that my 'go-to' methods for cleaning, getting healthy, etc are still maturing.  When I break it down, I just can't be extreme!  Taking an entire day to deep clean every single room in our house or drastically changing my diet whilst still making 'regular' meals for Matt and the boys...proves to be difficult(!!).

So, what can I do to seek out my new balance?

With my time, responsibilities as a wife/mother/bookkeeper/daughter of the King/artist/friend - I need to get creative.  My process of change, maybe won't have an extreme approach, as I did in the past, but can be effective by taking baby steps.  More so, in the long run.

"...we may never know these [plans] until they have already happened." written to me in a note from a friend the other day

My advance towards balance right now requires a great deal of patience and a trust that good things will come from my smaller actions and accomplishments.  Down to the littlest of things like foods we eat, smatterings of verses that get memorized, and cleaning schedules.  Also, knowing and believing that God does know my ultimate plan, purpose, and how all my tiny pieces of progress will one day come together.

"...He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God. That’s why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good."  romans 8:28

How are you juggling this season of balance right now?  How do you see God working that process for good in and around you?


pic pix: spending some sweet moments with the boys this morning (they have this "thing" for holding each others' hands when they first wake up. mama heart burst right there!), 02.May.2014, on the couch

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